Finishing out 2012

Well, hello there little blog. I promise I haven't forgotten you.

The month of time since my last post has been... one to remember.

We had a truly wonderful Christmas. Celebrating with Jakes family first, we had "Christmas" mid-December before they had to go back to the Dominican Republic. What a precious time. My mom and dad -in law- are so loved and missed. It truly did good to my heart to spend that time with them.

Santa's 8 reindeer! Otherwise known as the Spencer and Westbeld kids. ;)

Then came a rush of winter sickness. The four youngest all got strep throat. Then Jake had strep and the flu. And I had been feeling down... like, really down... but didn't find out until last week that it was Mono. :( Yuck. And anyway, all the kids except for Ashley came down with some sort of flu-like bug. A few days of a pretty low fever, feeling miserable, sort of a cough... but I don't think it was the actual flu.

Antibiotics anyone?

As always, we spent Christmas morning just our family. Among the hit toys this year: Ashley got a Furby, Emily a Barbie house, Micah a blow up ball pit, Abby a baby with a potty (in hopes she'll pick up the hint!), Mabry and Kate some accessories for their baby dolls.

And around lunch all the extended family (my side this time) came over. My mom got married this year, so this was our first Christmas with some new extended family. Plus my brother was in town. And because David (my mom's husband) has a wheelchair accessible van, my grandparents were able to come over, Papaw's wheelchair and all. The whole bunch of us under one roof. We all agree'd that it was one of the best Christmas' for our family. Such a sweet time we had together.

4 Generations :)

Jake passing out gifts

Nana (my mom) and Emily

Papaw and me

My brother Colby, my mom and me

My Christmas cards didn't go out until 4 days after Christmas. And because I wrote the addresses on all of them with wrong "orientation" (sideways), several came back. So if you usually get a Christmas card from me but didn't this year, sorry about that.

For New Years, our "Cheers Group" group came over. (Thats what our church calls small groups. Ya know, "where everybody knows your name") :) We made some yummy food, played some games, and laughed til our sides hurt. And at midnight, we tooted our noise makers on the front porch like a bunch of teenagers (and could be heard by every neighbor for a couple of blocks, I'm sure), but it was more fun than I've had in a long time! We sure love our group of friends and are so thankful for them. Its so cool to see the body of Christ being the body of Christ to one another and loving each other well.

Our whole bunch a' crazies. :)

Bacon wrapped jalapeno poppers!

Got to kiss this guy at midnight. :)

(I also posted a little clip from our crazy night on my YouTube channel. You can check it out by clicking on my YouTube link to the right.)

So after all the beauty and wonder of Christmas... 

and all the joy and laughter of New Years...

came something I was not prepared for. Something I need to work up the strength to write about. 

On January 2nd, my sweet, amazing, beloved Papaw went to be with Jesus. I'll share the story of that soon. And will hopefully find even more healing in telling it. For now I can say that God is good and we are all doing ok. We don't mourn like those who have no hope. (I Thes. 4:13)

But I miss my Papaw.

And that's a story for ... soon. But not now.

~~~


To all who read my humble little un-kept, infrequently updated blog- I pray that you and yours had a blessed 2012, a very Merry Christmas, and a wonderful New Year. From our family to yours....

The MANY sides...

I've thought about changing the name of my blog. I've never really been super crazy about it. It feels really self-centered.... or something. Like its all about me. And its not. But the point was this- I wanted a place where I can write the things that are in my heart, on my mind, or happening with my family. I could journal them, but this way family and friends can keep up with our family as well. And "the many sides" seemed to fit well since, as most mothers do, I wear so many hats.

Well, recently I've really been feeling every. one. of those sides. I'm a wife and I'm a mom. I'm an adoption advocate, adoptive parent, chauffeur, chef, crafter, cousin, granddaughter, daughter, daughter-in-law, sister, sister-in-law, friend, home economist, maid, and member of the DS community. And by the grace of God I am, above all, a child of God.

I think I'll keep the name.

The following should probably all be separate posts. But its all in my head at one time on any given day, so that's how I'm writing it.

Ashley and Emily are getting older and more mature every day. At their last doctors check-up, we talked about Ashley and uh... "girl stuff" being just a few years away. Things to watch for, how to handle it. Oh I'm not ready for that phase yet! Can we all just take a deep breath and slow this ride down?!

I've been talking with friends about our hopes and goals in parenting our precious children through the next several years. I don't want to miss even one of the very many teachable moments, training my girls to be ladies. Women of God. These years are so crucial. I want my kids to know they can talk to me about anything. I want to help them grow spiritually. I'm fully confident that I'm raising children in the end times and they need to be firm in their faith, able to rightly divide truth from lies. Sound biblical doctrine from the twisted things the world will throw at them. And I want to rally with other parents who feel the same way, to raise these warriors together. This is not for the faint of heart!

Meanwhile... recently I find that I could spend hours scouring my special needs and Down Syndrome boards online. Trying to figure out if things Micah and Abby are going through are common. 

Does anyone else's kids have these screaming/grunting fits? Does anyone else's kids try to escape? Is it "normal" for kids with Down Syndrome to have this difficult of a time potty training?

Everyone talks about how kids with DS are just the sweetest angels who are "otherworldly" and kind to everyone they meet. And don't get me wrong, Micah has a capacity to forgive that blows my mind. And Abby holds no prejudice, she can tell within seconds if someone is a genuinely kind person and will greet people with hugs that come from straight from her heart! But they also get angry, yell, don't want to share, push, hit, and are probably the most stubborn people in this house! (And if you know me, that's saying a lot.) :) Besides some physical and speech delays, they really are no different than anyone else.

But I constantly wonder- should I be disciplining them any differently? Should I be more sensitive? Do they get enough therapy for their needs? Am I doing something wrong?? Could I be doing something more??? *sigh* My mind could be full-time busy just navigating this road of parenting children with Downs.

Then there's the adoption stuff. MAN is my heart burdened in this area. If I had time, I would dive head first into this ministry. I've started a little group for the families at our church. I don't have a lot of time, or resources, just a strong desire to connect people. A desire to support adopting families and to encourage those who are home.

There are millions of orphans in this world. Children with no one to love, protect, and teach them. What will become of these kids? Lets just say the statistics are not good. If Jesus is the answer, and we are his hands and feet, where does that put me? I want to do something! Do you know how many kids are in my own county right now, in the vicious cycle of the foster system? Did you know most of them have to be housed out side of the county because there aren't enough foster families here? I could actually burst into tears right now just thinking about it. *BIG sigh*

As for my babies. I decided to really go full force potty training Abby and Mabry this week. (Because, ya know, I don't have enough on my plate this summer.) But literally- Mabry potty trained in one day. She has not had one single accident (aside from a wet pull up in the morning or after naps, which I don't count). I'm so proud of her! And Kate is so close to walking. Both of them are talking more and more every day. They are such cute, squishy girls and they just melt me with their adorable little smiles and personalities. Even Ashley will say, "Mom, Kate is just so cute, I can't stand it!" I mean, they are little and they have their moments and fits, but seriously, they are sunshine to everyone in this house. I could squish, kiss, tickle and play peek-a-boo all. day. long. AAHH! I love them so much it hurts!

Aaaaand, my husband. He has so much going on and he needs to come home to a somewhat sane wife. Who loves him, supports him, and does him good and not harm. In all things. I don't ever want to be so busy with the children and the house that I'm too emotionally checked out to be aware of whats going on in his world. I'm his best friend, beloved, and helpmate. First and foremost.


Did I mention I'm leaving for the Dominican Republic next week? Ashley, Emily and I are accompanying Jake and all the youth kids and leaders on the summer missions trip. Only we'll be staying with Jake's parents. (We've divvied up the 4 littles to some precious friends who are helping us out.) I'm so excited for Ashley and Emily to have a taste of another country, less fortunate than this lavish life we lead. But its been difficult to prepare them because, on one hand, this is Grandma and Grandpa's house. On the other hand, its the mission field. Its it's own unique thing, I guess.

Anyway, my mind is swimming trying to make packing lists and instructions for all four. Micah is his own world of instructions. ABBY is her own world of instructions. Then there's the babies with all of their gear.... Bottles, sippy cups, diapers (just for Kate, whoo hoo!), toys, doses for Tylenol, emergency contacts, medical releases. Then there's the packing for us... passports, copies of passports, books for the flight.... gonna have to weigh the bags to keep them under whatever the weight limit is... I'm nervous about customs with a 7 and 8 year old, just remembering how miserable it was going to Ukraine. And that was just me and Jake. But at least we'll be with a bunch of youth leaders and like 40 high schoolers. That should be fun. ;)

Back to my point. Or was there one? Oh right, the many sides.

Anyway, on top of all of this, the laundry and dishes in this house require so much care, I feel like I should mention them as a part of our family. Its like some crazy monster... if I threaten to break off a limb or two, he grows back 4 more. Where does it come from?! And Praise God for homemade laundry detergent, I'm loving that stuff. But ya know, every time I load the washing machine or dish washer, I try to remind myself that I could be hand washing all of this. Suddenly I don't mind so much. :)

~~~


I hope this whole post doesn't sound like complaining. I'm just... chronicling all of it. :) These are the many sides of me. Each a completely precious and sacred area of my life. I would never trade any of it away. I just have to find the balance in it all. And daily lay it before Jesus. These kids are his kids. Down Syndrome is no mystery to Him. Orphan care is closer to His heart than it is to mine. And I am doing what he created me to do. When you boil it all down, I'm Amy. Wife, mom, sinner saved by grace.

You shall increase my greatness, and comfort me on every side. (Ps. 71:21)
My flesh and my heart fail;But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. (Ps.73:26)

I'm with the band

I need to list another "side" on my Many Sides of Amy categories. The drummer's sister.

Have I ever mentioned here that my brother is kinda famous? He is. Google Colby Buckler. He's an amazing drummer. He plays with TwoFresh, Eliot Lipp and some other bands. He tours all over the country, playing in clubs and at festivals. TwoFresh was Relix Magazine's #1 "Up and coming artists you should know about" in October of last year. The genre is kind of like... electronic Hip Hop Jazz with computers and a live drummer- Colby. He is "one of the strongest drummers in the live electronic music scene today". And I'm only pretty sure I know what that means. ;)

Colby with TwoFresh

He's the tall one on the left. ;)

Wowing the fans

It was really irritating as a kid- the drums are not an instrument you want to hear you sibling practice daily. Nor do the neighbors... But since he was two, that's what he's been doing. But last night I got to witness (from an elite back-stage vantage) a whole venue full of fans shouting for him. I'm not gonna lie- it was weird.

He's playing in a different city almost every night. Mom's been to see him several times- anytime he plays close. But its been hard for me over the years to get out to his shows. But this weekend he was in Nashville, so we went together.

And going to see him was further confirmation to me that I'm getting old. He went on stage at 11... pm... which I'm told is unusually early. Seriously? I was leaving my house at the same time I'd normally be going to bed. And ya know, Starbucks isn't even open that late, so we had to settle for gas station coffee. 'Cause there was no WAY I was gonna make it through the evening (or is it morning at that point?) without some coffee. And once there, all of these uber-cool Nashvillian young adults at Mercy Lounge were surrounding me trying to show some ID, pay, and get a stamp on their hand. Meanwhile, I, with my coffee in hand and diaper bag on my shoulder (because I was too tired to find a cute purse) waited for them to find our names on "the list". I couldn't help but giggle a little as I would watch girls walk in painfully over-aware of themselves, trying to be sure they looked cute from every angle. I remember feeling that way in high school. It was miserable and I don't miss it.

Being the drummer's sister is a different hat for me. One I don't wear often. But I was so proud. Mom and I were shamelessly taking pics and videos with our phones while crazy looking people were dancing and bouncing all around us. Cheering for Colby. And I know mom was thinking the same thing I was. "That's MY Colby." Not that fame is everything; its really nothing and even Colby would tell you that. But it was hard to stand there and not be so proud of my little brother. He's worked his whole life to be an accomplished drummer. And he is.

I can say with confidence that Colby doesn't read my blog. So I don't mind telling you :) that on the other side of this whole thing, I'd love to see him settle down someday. Because I know this is a hard lifestyle. But for now he's doing what he loves and he's happy. So I'm happy for him. Did I mention how much I love my brother? Well I do. :)

These two were taken with my phone, so they're a little sketchy. And the video's didn't really turn out. :( You'll have to check him out on YouTube to see him really play.

 The one of mom with Colby was before the show. Below is me with Colby after the show, hence his sweaty shirt!

There you have it. I'm with the band. I'm the drummer's sister.