His feet

Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet and listened to his teaching. But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:38-42

We've been in Knoxville for exactly 2 months. The boxes are unpacked, curtains ordered and hung, the pictures are on the walls. The biggest tell-tale sign that we've just moved in is the already-tattered temporary paper blinds in the windows. But even the "real" blinds have ordered and will be in in a couple of weeks.

If you've just happened upon my little blog, we're here because we're planting a church with two other families. It's been a wild step of faith into the unknown for us all. But I wouldn't necessarily characterize it as scary either. When you know that you've taken a step that the Lord asked of you, there's a comfort in knowing He'll carry you through it. And this beautiful place has a way of making you fall in love. The river, the foothills of the Smokies, the abundance of parks... there's beauty all around us. And that's saying a lot if you know the gorgeous area we came from.

We're having regular Sunday services already; as well as a weeknight dinner and study for the college students/young adults. We've also been meeting with some of the families we've connected with here, having them over for dinner. I've met some pretty amazing people and I feel incredibly blessed at the thought of these people being our new community. And we've been so blessed to have friends and family from Nashville come to visit. It always does my heart so much good to see familiar faces.

All of these things happen here. In our home. If you know me at all, I love that! My heart is hospitality, it almost energizes me. I want to open my home. I worked hard to get it settled quickly because I knew that our house would be a hub for our little church community for a while. And its been so fun. It is truly a joy to be His hands and feet.

We are living and breathing community and fellowship. There are no big programs or ministries set yet. Everything we do involves coffee, face to face communication and loud kids running up and down the stairs. :) We're doing life together-- praying for any random thing that comes up, big or small. We share everything from kids clothes, to shopping finds, to leftovers that get divvied up and sent home after meals. This is such a precious time being the hands and feet of Jesus to one another and we are soaking it in. 

And every part that I'm responsible for in our home, I want to be diligent and do it to the best of my ability. I want to be Martha Stewart. And Paula Dean. And Charlotte Mason. And Anne Voscamp. And Beth Moore. And, and, and...

My spirit is willing and overjoyed.

And then. my flesh steps in. *facepalm* 

Its crazy how quickly you can go from serving to controlling. From being prepared to being obsessive. My heart is to create a warm (and clean) environment, prepare food, and welcome friends and family. But somehow, now and then, minutes before company arrives, I feel pressure. My inner control freak steps in. I bark orders at my kids and snap at my poor husband. And when our precious guests arrive, I open the door and it feels like I'm welcoming Jesus. I find myself in the midst of a (fairly) clean house and a prepared meal, but I am feeling exhausted and convicted. The enemy whispers that he just had a little victory and he laughs.

But then the voice of Jesus says, "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30

The Lord is so sweet to deal gently with me. One Sunday (I think it was actually our first Sunday) before service, we were getting the house ready. We all moved around furniture, made coffee and prepared snacks, Krystal and Alex went over their songs for worship, and we brought chairs in and set them up in our living room. After all the chairs were all nicely lined up, I saw that the back of them were dirty. Like, gunky dirty. So I grabbed a dish cloth and got to work. As it got close to time for people to arrive, Jake called together our team to pray for the service. But I wasn't done. And as our team all stopped what they were doing-- I prayed as I scrubbed chairs. And I kept on scrubbing after prayer was over. The chairs were clean(er) but as I finished and looked at them, I felt the Lord nudge me. I remembered the story of Mary and Martha. I didn't feel guilty, I felt convicted and that's how I knew it was the Lord. So I tucked it in my heart for later. 

That night I read Luke 10 and thought about Mary. God reminded me that sometimes, instead of being His hands and feet, I have to stop. And sit at His feet. Diligence, hard work, hospitality: these are good things. Romans 12:13 literally says to practice hospitality. But it begins in the heart. Wearing myself out so that I have nothing left to offer is not hospitality.

I'm not saying I won't still clean up or do all I can to prepare my home. Around here, it only takes a matter of hours for the baseboards to be hidden by laundry, the floor a landmine of legos and naked barbies and the dishes to overflow. I love my children but they are professional house dirtiers.

What I am saying is this. I'm purposing to prepare my heart as much, if not more than I prepare my home. After all, we don't invite people in because we have it all together. We invite people in so we can love one another as fellow followers of Jesus. (Or to share with those who don't know Him.) And in the process we find that sitting together is to sit as His feet, just as Mary did. 

"For where two or three are gathered together in my name, I am there in the midst of them." Matthew 18:20

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Do you host a small group, entertain often, or just have a heart for hospitality? She Reads Truth has an awesome series on Hospitality that is a precious resource. I'm not paid to say that or anything, I just really love their stuff. ;)