My dear friends

My dear friends, can I just share with you from my heart for a moment? I've been cleaning my house all day, feeding my kids, wiping faces... and rear ends, doing laundry, dishes... I've been on and off the phone with my mom and my husband- making plans for the week and the weekend. I've been checking my email and Dad's site, keeping it updated and forwarding on sweet emails from friends and family to my mom so she can read them to Dad.

And I can't help but think- I should be so stressed out right now. And don't get me wrong- I'm exhausted. And I'm worried. But I can 100% honestly say... I feel so covered. I feel a strength within that I almost find surprising. I'm able to deal with the day to day stuff. And I'm able to think clearly (as clear as possible for me- you guys know me). I keep telling people that I feel numb... but that doesn't really accurately describe it. That sounds like a negative thing, but actually, it's not.

My relationship with my God gives me perfect peace. Not that I am perfect, but that He is. I can feel my God carrying me through this. My life verse has always been John 10:10 "The thief comes to steel, kill, and destroy, but I have come that you would have life and have it more abundantly." (Jesus speaking.) He IS giving me abundant life. This- what I'm going through right now- is the difference between the life of a born again Christian and an unbeliever. The hope and the peace and the (dare I say it) joy that I feel can only be from my Lord. He loves me so much and I'm choosing to walk in His blessings.

And I'm also well aware that so much of it has to do with the prayers of those closest to me. I have received so many encouraging emails and phone calls in the last week... I KNOW that I'm loved and supported and it makes me want to cry because I keep thinking about the service at church this past Sunday (I wasn't able to be there, but I watched it live online while I mopped my kitchen floor, haha). I feel like I'm living the life of relationships with other believers that Christ wants me to live. We aren't afraid to LOVE ONE ANOTHER. To really show sacrificial commitment.

We won't be able to make it to our Cheers group tonight because Jake and I realized on the phone today that we won't be able to stay home any other nights this week and our family needs to come first. So we're gonna hang out with our kids tonight. But, I want you each to know how much I love you. And I don't intend on my goofy Internet blog being the only way to let you know that. I want to show you. I want to be the friend that you all are being to me right now. Words don't really express the gratitude in my heart. I love you girls.

My dad

Most of you know by now about everything going on with my dad. Its been a really rough couple of weeks for my family, to say the least. I started a blog today to keep all of our friends and family updated on his condition. You can see it by clicking on the "Hows Greg?" link on the right. Please pray for us all as we go through this... and for Dad...

Holland

I love my kids. All three individually. They each have their own unique personallity. And though Abby has Down Syndrome, we try to keep it on the down low. It does not define my daughter, but its a major part of her life. Not long after Abby was born I found this little article. While I don't know that this is about Down Syndrome specifically, this is such a beautifully true description of what we experienced. I was thinking of this especially yesterday... most of you know I had found a little Ecuadorian boy on Reece's Rainbow, Josue :) who completely stole my heart. And while Jake was making "no way Josue" jokes, I couldn't get this little boy out of my head. So I was praying and praying about this today, I decided to take a step in one direction or the other and emailed his adoption agency. And within the hour they emailed back to tell me that he's already been adopted. He's home. :) Which is wonderful news for him and a final answer for me to put him out of my head. A door closed, which is exactly what I prayed for. And though adoption is a totally different experience- you know what you're getting into- still all day I've had this article in my head. Thinking of the day Abby came home to be a part of our family. This is exactly how I felt. It brought tears to my eyes the first time I read it because it hurt so bad to be in Holland. But when I read this now, I can appreciate that I've been to Italy AND Holland. And I LOVE both places. And it makes me smile...

"I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try and help people understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this....

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guidebooks and make wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas of Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It is all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, 'Welcome to Holland.'

'Holland???' you say. 'What do you mean, Holland? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy.' But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay. The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place. So you must go out and buy new guidebooks. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you have been there for a while you catch your breath, you look around and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills, Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts. But everyone you know is busy coming and going to Italy, and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say, 'Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned.'

And the pain of that will never, ever go away, because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss.
But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't go to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland."

One more

Ok, so three post in one day is BIG for me. :) But I have this one last picture that I have to share... one of the girl's friend's, Lily turned three last week (a lot of birthday's, I know!), and I got this picture of Abby... it was a "Princess dress-up party", which you KNOW my kids loved, but I even dressed up little Abby. Its kinda hard to see her little outfit, but she looked so sweet and I think it really shows what a big girl she's getting to be. Enjoy. :)

Girls Night Out

No, not "the girls", but my friends "the girls". : ) Mindy and D'Arcy had birthdays last week and we've kinda made it a tradition over the years to go out for a girls night and celebrate their birthdays together. What a blast we had!!! We started with dinner at Cheesecake Factory and ended with a "picture schavenger hunt". (Which I won't show pictures of.) Anyway, dinner was great and we played quite a few rounds of "shout an emotion"... which I am reluctantly sharing with you. Anyway, we had an awesome night out with no kids, no husbands, and no worries. It was VERY refreshing. :)









Shout an emotion explains its self really... you shout an emotion just before you snap...

I can't believe I'm posting this. :)

Ashley's Birthday

Wow, what a busy month, and it still isn't over! Ashley turned five last week... yes FIVE. I can't believe how big she's getting. We had a little party at church with Bible study friends and then another party at home with just family. Here are a few pics from church-

Thanks to all for the sweet gifts and for being a part of this little milestone in her life. We love you all!