I wanna be moved

I love how the Lord give us what we need when we need it.

Why do I forget/doubt how much my Creator knows my heart?

In women's Bible study, we just started the Beth Moore series, "Stepping Up: A  journey through the Psalms of Ascent" And while we watched the session together yesterday morning, one of the things Beth was talking about was songs. It was a great message that I could talk about forever. But to stay on point, I'll suffice to say that I found myself thinking, "Lord put a song in my heart. Give me something fitting for this season."

This morning I got up and did my usual morning routine. Stumble out of bed, down the stairs and pour a cup of coffee with one eye open. And then I had my quiet time with the Lord. But today was an especially sweet time with Him. I dug deep in my heart. And the cry I found? I want to go deeper; I want more.

As a stay at home mom, its so easy to slip into the mundane. Its so easy to let the monotony of your daily routine wash over and sweep you out to a sea of complacency. I want to be filled with You God. Fill me. I want more of You. I need more of You.

I. Want. More. And my God promises me that if I ask, I'll receive.

But, I had to move along with my morning. Packing lunches, making oatmeal, french braiding hair and matching socks, chatting with beloved car pool moms and kissing my boy as he got on his bus. Then its back into the house for diaper changes, a bottle for the baby, and cleaning up aftermath from the hurricane that sweeps across my kitchen counters between 6:30 and 8:00am every day.

I flipped on my ipod as usual and the song that came on stopped me in my tracks and brought tears to my eyes.

"I don't want to be a flame, I wanna be a raging fire. Tired of my will, my way, Your calling's higher. I know its time I stopped running from the truth so I'll stand here still until I'm filled, I wanna be moved."

An old Ginny Owen's song "I wanna be moved" Only You, Lord.

So this is my song.


"I don't want to be a flame, I wanna be a raging fire". Not a flickering tea light but an epic, out of control, bonfire! I want my life to be marked by passion. I want to be emptied of myself and filled with the fire of the Holy Spirit. The works of my hands, the works of His hands. My countenance, His. My attitude, His. You know that feeling when you're so in love with the Lord that you could just be raptured up right then and there? I want that more. A raging fire... *sigh*

"Tired of my will, my way." As a mom, its easy to slip into doing everything "my way". I'm the mom, I know what's best for my kids! But does it spill over into other areas of my life? If I'm honest I think I know whats best for myself as well. I'm daily teaching my kids to trust me and obey the first time. (And what an uphill battle that can be.) But if I stand here still and listen, the Lord is telling me to trust Him; His way is better. And obey... the first time. He's patient with me, much more patient than I am with my own children. But it, dare I say it, takes me even longer to "get it" then it does my kids.

Whew.

Fill me with fresh fire. A flame that burns wildly for You. I pray that it would spill over into my home and onto my children. I don't want complacency. I need a fresh word for this season. New manna from heaven. I get it, God. I trust you. I'm obeying. Mold me. Use me. I'm yours. I wanna be moved. Amen.

And when they had prayed, the place where they were assembled together was shaken; and they were all filled with the Holy Spirit, and they spoke the word of God with boldness. Acts 4:31