Last night before bedtime, I sat with Emily and had a little heart to heart... or so I'd planned.
We sat crosslegged on my bed facing one another- she had this huge grin plastered across her face just excited to be having some one on one time with mommy.
I had every intention of pulling out the recesses of my childs heart... bringing to light her excitements, fears and anxieties about starting Kindergarten next week. Helping her direct her emotions instead of bottling them up. I realize this might sound a little over dramatized but I don't ever want any of my kids to feel like they are walking into something alone or worse- be hiding fear about a situation. I wanted to be an involved parent and pray with her as this exciting new chapter of her life unfolds. To give her the tools to handle whatever she's dealing with.
Me: So, Emily. School starts next week.
Emily: Mmm hmmmmmmmm. {Her tiny little fingers interlaced in her lap}
Me: Are you excited?
Emily: {A little more enthusiasticly:} Mmm HHMMMMMMMM. :)
Me: Are you scared at all?
Emily: Nope! {Still fully grinning}
Me: {Thinking this isn't quite going as deep as I had planned, so I dig a little more} So... what do you think it will BE like?
Emily: Well DEFINITELY, I'm gonna eat CANDY on the way home because thats what Ashley did!!!!!!!
I couldn't help but laugh out loud. This kid is gonna be fine. And she's a COMPLETELY different kid than Ashley was at her age. We hugged before she skipped her light hearted little self right out the door. And that was the end of that. Oh Emily. :)
Name: Amy Spencer Age: 27 Occupation: Full time mom
Mission #1: Buying school supplies, school clothes and uniforms for 1 first grader, 1 kindergartner and 2 preschoolers Deadline: Thursday, August 5, 2010 (for the preschoolers) and Thursday, August 12, 2010 (for K and 1st) My plan of attack: Planning 5 outfits each for the ones in uniforms (so I can wash and iron everything on the weekend for the following week), deduct what clothing of Ashley's from last year still fits her or now fits Emily, and purchase remaining items from thechildrensplace.com (20% off sale plus add'l 20% off WYB $50 or more plus free shipping coupon) or some from friends. Stock up on cheap shirts, pants and dresses from Target for the preschoolers. Create a master supply list (shown below) for all four kids. Get necessities from my local target for the preschoolers. On friday (first day of tax free weekend)- leave the girls with Jake, take Micah to school, and go drop a load of money at walmart. I have no coupons for the supplies- I'm fighting against time and childcare. Then hit up the teacher supply store for specialty items. If I have any time, energy or money left over, I'm going to Joanns to buy supplies to make bows (because, well, I enjoy that). For backpacks, I've used 1 part detergent, 1 part shout and 1 part water to scrub down the ones from last year. And they look pretty darn good if I do say so myself.
The supply list:
1 Glue- white in large bottle 2 Emers glue bottles 7oz. 8 Glue sticks- regular size 6 Elmers large glue sticks 3 Block erasers- not pencil top 2 Pink erasers- large size 1 Pkg pencil training grips 2 Pkg Twist up crayons 24 count 2 Crayola Markers- box of washable, classic colors, no thin line (10 pk with pink and gray) 2 Crayola markers- classic colors, washable broad tip- 8 ct 3 Crayola regular crayons- 24 ct 2 pkgs #2 yellow pencils- 12 ct 2 pkgs #2 yellow pencils- 6 ct 1 Yellow highlighter 4 Sanford expo low odor dry erase markers, black color only 2 Box of colored pencils 2 Watercolor set- 8 count 1 Pkg 11x17 construction paper, mixed colors (1st) 1 100 sheets 12x18 construction paper, assorted colors (K) 1 50 sheets 12x18 bright white construction paper 2 Tablets of Writing paper (dotted line between 2 solid lines) 1 Dry Erase student lap board (9x12) 1* Mead primary journal-- stage 3, 100 sheets, pages are 1/2 blank and 1/2 lines 1* Ream of newsprint 1* Ream of Zanier Bloser Handwriting paper; grade 1, 5/8 inch rule, red baseline 3 Plastic pocket folders- 1 red, 1 yellow, 1 blue - with brads in middle 4 Polyplastic folders with pockets (Red, yellow, green, blue) 1 1 1/2" 3 ring binder with pockets inside and clear view pocket outside 1 Pkg unlined index cards (small size) 2 Fiskar brand blunt metal safety scissors- no pointed ones 1 Wooden ruler (inches and cm) 1 small school box 5 1/2 x 8 1/2 plastic only, no zippered pouches 3 2 pk white paper towels 1 Box of qt size freezer bags 2 Box gallon size ziplocs 2 Box sandwich size ziplocs 7 Box of kleenex 7 Box of antiseptic wipes 8 Box baby wipes 5 Large bottle hand sanitizer 2 Bottles multi-purpose spray cleaner (non-bleach) 2 Cans disinfectant spray 4 Pkgs of snacks 2 Pkgs of pull ups with tear away sides 2 Nap mat 2 Small blankets for nap 1 Beach towel for rest time 4 Backpacks (no wheels) 4 Lunch boxes 4 Changes of clothes with name in ziploc bags {*Available at Teacher Supply store)
The clothes list:
2 Dresses (a) 3 Shirts (a) 2 Cotton knit pants (a) 3 Shirts (M) 4 Pkg socks (a, M, A, E) 4 knee high socks (AA, EE) 1 Sweater (E) 2 Jumper Dress (A, E) 2 Biker shorts (A, E) 2 SS Polo (AA) 2 LS Polo (AA) 2 Pants (A, E) 2 Shorts (A, E) 3 Tights (A, EE) 2 Shoes (A, E) Bows
Mission #2: Academically, emotionally and spiritually prepare my kids for School Deadline: No deadline, mission just changes after school begins Plan of attack: Lots of reading time and flash cards, lots of hugs and kisses, lots of prayer
**Randomness warning. Don't say you weren't warned.**
Do you ever just wanna? You know, you're in the middle of your day and think, "Man, I just wanna {fill in the blank}. Thats all." (And occasionally its followed by "Is that so much to ask?")
Except that's not all. There's a whole lot of just wanna's. And as we all know, even if we HAD all of our just wanna's, we still wouldn't be happy. But for kicks, I thought I'd share the just wanna's that come through my head most often.
I just wanna...
...buy a great camera.
...live in a Pottery Barn catalog.
...have hair like Ashley's.
...own a large farmhouse and take care of foster kids.
...take a nap.
...have enough money to donate to each of my adopting friends.
...throw a killer backyard party for Jake's 30th birthday.
...go back to Maui for my 10 year anniversary.
...have ONE phone conversation without being interrupted.
...have my pre-baby body back.
...make cornbread like Grannies.
...FINISH the laundry and dishes.
...show my husband that I'm still crazy about him.
...find two shoes that match.
...be fluent in sign language. And spanish.
...read a book. From beginning to end. In THAT order. (Ok, this one is actually a quote. 10 points to the person who can guess which show.)
...be a carpenter so I can build my own bookshelves for the house.
...throw away every toy in this house. Ok not really.
...dedicate one whole room in my house to crafting.
...yeah I think that's about it. If I think of any more, I'll letcha know. ;)
After a long... long... crazy... long summer :) I'm happy to report that I've hit a new season. And I'm not sure how to describe it exactly. In a nutshell- its a season of refreshing. Its like a cool glass of lemonade on a hot summers day-- of the spirit.
All summer I feel like I've been a punching bag. All kinds of crazy things coming at me from all different angles. Knocking me down and watching to see if I would pop back up. I won't go into what those things have been, there's no need. Because now, that season is over. (Praise God...)
And now, I'm finding myself refreshed. I went on a much needed mini-vacation this past weekend. No kids, no husband. A last minute girls trip, if you will, but more of a desperate grasp at sanity for those going. "A chance to miss my kids" was one description that I thought fit well. :)
I prayed on the way there that God would multiply the time. I know how these things go- they pass in the blink of an eye. Before you take a deep breath, you're home. But I prayed. And God followed through BIGtime. I was gone a little over 24 hours and it felt like 3 or 4 days. Seriously. I came home saying, "Did I REALLY leave YESTERDAY??" It was awesome.
And what happened in my heart was a much needed shower of mercy and grace. Forgiveness and refreshing. I ate, slept, shopped, browsed, sat, talked, laughed and enjoyed. I soaked in every minute. And it was balm for the soul.
Pastor Dave Buehring has been preaching some messages about the heart recently. And I've been taking them to heart. Searching the deep recesses... taking the time to really search and find the places that have been hardened and need softening. Rekindling the passion for my first Love. Asking God to give me a new heart. A heart pleasing to Him.
And I had a perspective shift. A much needed step back to look at the big picture. *Deep breath* It makes looking at each tiny piece each and every day, so much easier. I really love being a mom. And if I'm honest, I like the craziness (why do I have a feeling some of you are smiling right now because you already knew that). I love babies and their squishy legs and soft smell. I love when toddlers make senseless babble but they're completely serious. I love the revelations of preschoolers. And I love the purity of budding friendships of Kindergartners. I love cheerios under my table and peanut butter on my shirt. I know these years will be over in no time and I don't want to miss it because I didn't check my heart.
God is doing amazing things with my husband right now. And I don't want to miss that either. I don't want to be so bogged down with day to day frustrations that I'm not being a wife and helpmate. I want to the woman of God he needs. I want to be the warrior at home praying deeply and daily. There's no telling where (or when) God is taking him next and I want to be ready. Ready to take our family where God takes him.
I'm ready to dive in to first days of school, car pooling, and dare I say it- cooler weather. :) Ready for whatever bend in the road might be headed our way.
And don't get me wrong- this is a daily renewal. Every time I feel that old feeling rising up again, I stop, and literally put my arms over my face and pray. "God refresh me again. Fill me anew. Breath in me." And a supernatural energy comes over me and that plumbline perspective sets things right. I love this new season.
My grandfather took this picture and sent it to me with this poem today. :)
There was a young lady who lived in a shoe Had more kids then she knew what to do But some things she accomplished and did just fine She would change the kids diapers, three at a time!
And my defense- they sit still better for changing when they're lined up!
A couple of weeks ago Abby had the big, long awaited endoscopy. She didn't have it done because she's had any sort of concerning symptoms (aside from the explosive stools which are gone now that the parasite is gone) but because she had a screening for Celiac Disease-- a screening that's pretty much standard for a 3 year old with Down Syndrome-- and came back with "elevated levels". Which meant she needed to see a GI specialist, who in turn ordered an endoscopy. But they did tell us before it was done that Giardia (parasite) can mimic the signs of Celiac in a blood screening. And she had only been a couple of weeks over it.
So we did the endoscopy, and the actual procedure went great. She was a cute little trooper in her green scrubs. The staff was all super sweet and the nurse even carried her back instead of wheeling her back on the bed.
When it was over (and it was fast) they came back and got us. We followed the nurse, came around the corner, and there she was- the cutest little sight. Sitting up on the bed surrounded by a pile of blankets and sheets holding her little pink sippy cup of apple juice. She had lines on her cheek from "sleeping" and her eyelids still looked incredibly heavy. That was the first time that Abby has had any procedure done and in completely melted my heart to see her sitting there. To those of you who've had children go through surgeries both minor and major- I don't know how you do it. This was such a small taste and I just wanted to scoop her up and take her home right then.
But we sat for a little longer while she came out of the anesthesia. And then we had an unexpected visitor. A beautiful 20-something woman with dark hair and glasses came around the corner. She had a Vanderbilt Hospital ID lanyard around her neck. Our nurse said "Oh! Guys this is Jessica. Jessica, meet Abby. Abby has Down Syndrome" To which Jessica's face lit up a bit as she replied "I have Down Syndrome!" We actually met her at church years ago (right after Abby was born). At that time I was still heavily processing this unexpected diagnosis and what it meant for my tiny daughter. To meet Jessica three years ago was an odd mix of comfort and difficulty that I still can't really put into words. But to meet Jessica now... was nothing but encouragement and hope. This amazing young woman is on staff at Vanderbilt through Project Opportuniy. She told us about how she works at the hospital changing beds and refilling Juice boxes among many other tasks. I really really enjoyed sitting there talking with Jessica for the few minutes that we had. It was an honor, actually.
Anyway, we packed up Abbs and took her home. Then about a week later we got the results. And to the best of my understanding, this is our news: Abby does not currently have Celiac. But based on what this doctor has seen in other patients with DS and/or Celiac- she's developing it. And would therefore benefit from a gluten free diet. *BIG sigh* And he did also find something else... its complicated but basically its most commonly seen in people with Cystic Fibrosis. Now, he said that we shouldn't be too concerned because he doesn't really think that she has cystic fibrosis. But he wants to do a genetic test just to be on the safe side. And given that taking Abby's blood requires heart wrenching screaming and 3 grown men to hold her down- they're going to do the test in January when she goes back to the DS clinic and they'll be drawing her blood anyway. And they'll also keep screening her for Celiac to see how and if its developing.
The bright side of all of this to me is that as of right now- she doesn't have anything! Its all potential. And its all down the road. Which gives us time to pray. For complete healing before it even starts. And thats what I'm going to do.
And as for the gluten free diet- I'm waiting just a bit. I'm going to gather information on how to eat that way, what to eliminate, what the heck I'm gonna cook, etc, etc and my goal is to make the gluten switch when school starts. So if you have any amazing gluten free diet sites, tricks or suggestions, by all means throw 'em my way. Seriously, lol! You can email me at spencerchics@yahoo.com
So, I went later and looked up Project Opportunity and found this video. I wanted to share so that you can see this sweet young woman for yourself. She's the one in the pink scrubs. ;)
